A Delicate Balance

10. January 2009 · 6 comments · Categories: Uncategorized · Tags: , ,

Greetings from Southwest Asia!

Now that I’ve gotten some sleep, I can write something that makes sense. I am well…I’m well rested, I’ve unpacked and am settled into my dorm room, and I’ve started my training program to learn my new job. The food here is decent and I’ll be getting plenty of exercise.

I’m glad to finally be here! I don’t know whether I’ve let on or not, I’ve been wanting to do this for many years since I joined the AF Reserves and I’m thrilled to be part of it! Dave can attest to how many times I’ve come home from drill weekends bubbling about a deployment opportunity I’d heard about…

I promise pictures soon, but I want to wait till I have a chance to get my room a little more worked out.

Obviously I’m not going to be giving specifics about what I’m doing here (except that I’m doing weather work), but I’d like to share funny stories that give an idea of what life is like here.

The first story is about my first night’s sleep. After I landed, I couldn’t sleep right away, I had to do some paperwork. Then I needed to switch mattresses and do some rearranging to make things a little more spacious. Then I could make my bed and fall asleep. I was so tired my eyes were closed before my head even hit the pillow! I had slept 2 hours in the previous 40.

I woke up about 5 hours after I fell asleep because I had to go potty. So I got out of bed, put on my shoes and had to walk out the door to the latrine. Imagine walking out your home’s front door and then going to your neighbor two houses down to use their bathroom. Don’t get me wrong, my room is nice, the bathroom facilities are nice….but it was such a distance! And I was SO TIRED! It’s about a 90 second walk in each direction.

Could I hold it? I tried to go back to sleep but couldn’t unless I went to the bathroom. So I did, and I didn’t have a problem getting back to sleep.

So here’s my delicate balance. It’s important to stay hydrated but I don’t want my bladder to disrupt my sleep like that. There must be some perfect amount of water to drink for that.

I’ve taken for granted how easily I can slip out of bed in the middle of the night and use the bathroom and get back to sleep in 1-2 minutes!

A chamber pot crossed my mind, but the thought of walking the filled chamber pot 90 seconds to the bathroom in the morning grossed me out. Ewwww….

And I’m leaving you with that thought. You’re welcome!

Fatigue: 8 Jan 09 1915Z

09. January 2009 · 2 comments · Categories: Uncategorized · Tags: , ,

(wrote this on the plane about 6 hours earlier)
Fatigue: 8 Jan 09 1915Z
Not since Timmy was a newborn have I felt this tired. My hair looks
like death, and my face has broken out like a teenager’s! I’ve
swollen feet and fingers, and the odor of…um…others…have
dominated my nostrils since Italy (I’m near the lavatory).
I took off from Baltimore about 14 hours after I awakened on the
morning of the 7th.
7 hours to Germany. 2 hours on the ground.
1 hour to Italy, 3 hours on the ground.
I’ve been in the air between Italy and my final destination for about
2 hours now. I land at my final destination in about 3 hours.
Let’s do some math and he how long I’ve been awake: 14 + 7 + 2 + 1 + 3
+ 2 = 29 hours
(my record is around 48 hours, give or take, fall 1998).
I’m at “stupid tired” now…it’s taking me forever to type this, in
fact. I’ve already flipped a full coffee cup all over my legs.
On a good note, one of the senior NCOs who used to be in my
flight…who’s now stationed in Germany at the base we stopped
at…met us in the passenger gate area during our 2 hour stop. It was
wonderful to see him and his wife again.
It’s been over 10 years since I was last in Germany and the windmills
all over the hilltops were quite the sight. Those didn’t exist when I
was there in 1998.

"Are You in the REAL Army???"

06. January 2009 · Comments Off on "Are You in the REAL Army???" · Categories: Uncategorized · Tags: , ,

At the gate in Omaha, a little boy (7-8 years old, I would guess) came
up to me and asked,”Are you in the REAL Army?”  My answer was
“Actually, I’m in the Air Force”. And I pointed to my uniform where it
reads “U.S. Air Force”. He said “Cool!” and returned to his parents.
I had to resist the tempation to explain to the child the crime of
inpersonating a military member. Or tell him that I’m in a fake
Army. 🙂
(Smile! That was meant to be funny!)

Saying Goodbye

06. January 2009 · Comments Off on Saying Goodbye · Categories: Uncategorized · Tags: , , ,

I had to say goodbye to my boys this morning.
Surprisingly, no tears…so far.

Disaster Cake

05. January 2009 · 2 comments · Categories: Uncategorized · Tags: , , , ,

This is a Pre-Birthday cake for Timmy. We’re going to do cake and a couple gifts tonight, mainly so Mommy gets her chance to sing “Happy Birthday” to her almost-4-year-old. Dad plans to have a few friends over for cake and ice cream closer to Timmy’s actual birthday on the 26th.
But the cake! Where do I begin??? First the icing base coat fills with crumbs, making the icing layer appear all mottled. Then the spray-on yellow square has some bleed off. Then I run out of icing before I can really finish Spongebob. I had planned to dress him, at least.
But look on the bright side: I don’t think there’s any doubt in who that is, right??

Preparing the Boys

05. January 2009 · 2 comments · Categories: Uncategorized · Tags: , ,

This not a rigid amount of time but I think it’s a good estimate…90
days in theater, plus some travel time on both ends. Jacob will have a
new responsibility: adding one number on the left, subtracting one on
the right…every day till I come home.
With Jacob’s affinity for numbers this will be really good for him.

Howie, My Forgotten Baby

04. January 2009 · 2 comments · Categories: Uncategorized · Tags: , ,

I just realized that I never blogged about Dave’s and my first baby, Howie.

From Howie

The day we got him, he had to wear the leash for about 24 hours straight and the crate was his home for the first 18 months or so.

Or Howard.

Or Howie-the-Wonder-Dog.

From Howie

Howie is our 8 1/2 year old Lab-Chow Chow mixed breed puppy. We got him in August 2000, just after our 5th anniversary, from a shelter in Kettering (near Dayton), Ohio. Dave and I were grad students at the time, and it wasn’t hard for us to spend enough time at home to help housetrain Howie. We also had ample time for some good training early on, which is probably the best time investment you can make in a pet

From Howie

We were hoping for a big, Lab-sized dog with Lab-length fur, and we ended up with something closer in size and fur to a Border Collie. Howie is a very calm dog, rather quiet, and chasing rodents is his #1 downfall.
From Howie

This is the scene that Dave and I faced when we’d head out the door to school in the morning…Howie with a toy in his mouth, making us feel SO guilty for leaving him for a few hours.

Before we had human babies, Howie was the one we would spoil at Christmas, he’d come with us everywhere, and before the quarantine rules changed, we were even convinced that we didn’t want to get stationed in Hawaii, we couldn’t bear to have to quarantine Howie for a number of months!

From Howie

Howie would jump the gate when it was just one gate, so we had to use two baby gates.

Howie is the most laid-back dog you’ll ever know. In fact, he’s more like a cat in so many ways! He enjoys sitting at a window looking out at the world and he’s a very picky eater. He doesn’t play with toys the way other dogs do — Howie has his favorite stuffed dinosaur and bunny rabbit (from his puppy days) but otherwise he enjoys chasing squirrels in our backyard, and nipping at loose pant legs.

From Howie

Howie lounging on his “Civil War” dog bed, which I made from leftover material from reenacting costumes I’d made.

So many of our boys’ friends, who previously may not have liked dogs, ended up loving Howie to death and would start bugging their parents for pets of their own (sorry Wendy and Julie!)

From Howie

Howie (left) playing wth his two dog friends in Florida, Jerome (right) and Moxie (top). We 3 families would trade around dogsitting in FL. This was in Florida, but Jerome and Moxie are now in Ohio.

(Okay, so I’m a little biased!)

From Howie

Over the years, Howie has had to take a back seat to the boys. I feel badly at how often we have to leave Howie out of a family outing because having the boys with us was enough trouble. Howie was subjected to years of having toddler boys around, each of our boys had a good 18-24 months of “Don’t pull Howie’s tail!” or “Don’t sit on Howie!” or “Please leave Howie’s dog food alone!”.

From Howie

Howie is keeping an eye on the construction workers while we had tile floors put into our FL house, late 2004.

This past summer, just before we left North Carolina, we took Howie for a checkup and our vet deemed Howie a “senior dog”. Howie had put on some weight in North Carolina, and he had the worst allergies…his gorgeous coat was definitely compromised while we were living there. I wanted to cry at the thought of our first baby now being a “senior”.

From 2007 06 17 Family Reunion PA

One of Howie’s favorite things to do, chase the hay wagon at the Vollmer family reunion!

So here are some pictures of Howie for you to enjoy…when I talk about how much I’m going to miss my boys when deployed, Howie is among my boys!

From 2007 05 01 Howies Birthday

We had a birthday party for Howie in 2007, Jacob said that Howie needs a cake, so we made one for him, and Howie even got to enjoy a big piece! (No chocolate!)

(See how grey he’s getting around the muzzle? Sniff sniff!)

From 2007 06 17 Family Reunion PA

Dave, Mentos, and a 2 Liter Bottle of Diet Coke

02. January 2009 · 2 comments · Categories: Uncategorized · Tags: , , ,

Yeah, you know what’s about to happen!

If you’re interested in how we did this, you can check out this website that explains it pretty well, and tries to sell you the apparatus we have here, the Geyser Tube by Steve Spangler Science. I picked up ours at our local Hobby Lobby store and stuck it in Dave’s Christmas stocking.
A Facebook friend suggested that you can do something similar by rolling up paper to hold the Mentos and holding a plain playing card underneath it. Remove the playing card and let the Mentos fall into the bottle. I like the apparatus I’m pitching above because it has a pull string that keeps you about a foot further away from the bottle, and you can get away from the shower of soda faster.

Happy New Year, Friends! A Smile For You.

01. January 2009 · 4 comments · Categories: Uncategorized · Tags: ,

Happy New Year to my Blog-readers! Thank you for your continued support, hopefully I’ve done my job in keeping friends and family informed of my goings-on this past year. While attempting to keep it entertaining.

This funny story came to me from one of our North Carolina neighbors. She and her son and his girlfriend used to dogsit Howie on our many weekend roadtrips.

To my Dog loving friends out there

WHAT PETS WRITE IN THEIR DIARIES…..

Excerpts from a Dog’s Diary……


8:00 am – Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am – A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am – A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am – Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm – Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm – Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm – Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm – Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm – Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm – Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm – Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat’s Daily Diary…


Day 983 of my captivity..

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a ‘good little hunter’ I am.

Bastards.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of ‘allergies.’ I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try th is again tomorrow — but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released – and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now………………

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